He had just bought his third house. He had rented out the previous two. When he woke up in the morning, he opened his banking app and checked his balance. It was good. Then he went on Instagram. He saw a friend’s post showing a holiday abroad. Suddenly, he felt something was missing. He recognised what was missing: a house in the north. He said to his wife: “Let’s buy a villa too.” His wife looked at him and said: “Farhad, five years ago when you bought the first house, you said you’d never need anything again. Last year when you bought the second house, you were happy for a month. How long do you think this one will last?” Farhad didn’t sleep that night. Not because of his wife’s answer, but because of the question whispering in his ear: “When will it be enough?”
Success is a familiar yet ambiguous word. Each of us holds an image of success in our minds – an image often imposed by culture, media, and those around us. But does this image align with what we are truly seeking deep inside? Daniel Kahneman, the Nobel Prize‑winning psychologist, concluded in his research that once basic needs are met, increased income has a negligible impact on happiness and life satisfaction [1]. A person reaches a point where “more” no longer means “happier”. This thought‑provoking finding calls us to rethink our definition of success.
In the modern world, success is often measured by quantitative and material criteria: income level, size of house, car model, job title, number of followers on social media. These criteria are everywhere, and they unconsciously push us to equate “having more” with “being better”. But from a deeper view of life, true success emphasises qualitative and inner indicators: inner peace, heartfelt satisfaction, service to others, moral growth, and closeness to the truth [6]. This fundamental difference in perspective explains why someone may be very materially successful but not feel happy, or why someone with limited means may have a deeply satisfying life.
In an even deeper view, true success lies in approaching the truth – not a physical location, but a spiritual and moral state in which a person embodies higher qualities. Such a person does not seek success in having more; they find it in “being better”. The ultimate goal is “human perfection” – the balanced growth of all dimensions of existence: physical, emotional, social, intellectual, and spiritual. All these dimensions must grow harmoniously for a person to achieve inner balance and peace.
Martin Seligman, in his book *Authentic Happiness*, describes sustainable happiness not in terms of fleeting pleasures, but through five distinct elements: positive emotion, engagement (doing things that absorb us), meaningful relationships, meaning and purpose (belonging to something larger than ourselves), and accomplishment (for its own sake, not for external reward) [7]. These elements closely resemble the various dimensions of human perfection and the “good life” spoken of in religious texts.
So, how can we redefine success in a meaningful way? There are four practical steps:
1. **Identify your core values** – Sit down and make a list of what truly matters to you (honesty, kindness, justice, learning, serving others). Not what others say is important.
2. **Reduce consumerism** – For one month, limit impulsive and showy purchases (things you buy just to display).
3. **Pay attention to spiritual growth** – Set aside time each day for study, reflection, or solitude.
4. **Measure with qualitative criteria** – Assess your daily success not by “how much did I earn”, but by “how peaceful was I”, “how much did I help others”, “how close did I come to my values”.
The transition from a materialist to a spiritual view does not mean negating the world; it means placing it in its proper place.
Core exercise of this subchapter:
This week, every night before sleep, ask yourself this question and write the answer: “If no one knew what I achieved today, would I still be satisfied with myself?”
At the end of the week, review your answers. On how many days was your answer “yes”? Did those days coincide with days when something special happened in material terms? Or did you discover another pattern?
Sensory exercise: Walking among your “possessions” with eyes closed
Gather all the things you have bought in the past month that you really didn’t need, in one room. Close your eyes. Slowly walk among them. Kick them gently with your feet, hear their sound. Without looking, using only touch and hearing. After 5 minutes, write: “What feeling does the presence of these objects give me? Heaviness? Lightness? Suffocation? If I gave them all away to others tomorrow, how would I feel?”
For those in a hurry:
Three signs of being trapped in material success:
1. After reaching each goal, you eagerly think of the next goal.
2. You constantly compare yourself to others and feel a sense of lack.
3. You do not enjoy the simple things in life.
Quick solution: Make a “real wealth list” of things that have no price (your friend’s health, your child’s laughter, the sunrise, your ability to see and hear). Look at this list every day.
For those who want to go deeper:
– Kahneman, Daniel. (2011). *Thinking, Fast and Slow*. (Persian translation by Foruzandeh Davarpanah, 2016). University of Tehran Press. (Chapter 36: Income and Happiness)
– Seligman, Martin. (2002). *Authentic Happiness*. (Persian translation by Reza Mohammadi, 2016). Qatreh Publications. (Chapters 1 & 2)
– Tabatabaei, Seyyed Mohammad Hossein. (1995). *Tafsir al‑Mizan*, Vol. 15. Qom: Islamic Publications Office. (Under Surah al‑Mu’minun)
Open question for this subchapter:
Now you tell me: If someone asked you, “What was the most successful day of your life?”, which day would you remember? On that day, what “more” did you gain? Or what “better” did you become? Write the difference between these two in one sentence.
